General Update
From Paul:
Cycle Three (Continued)
This week is week three of the new oral chemo pill ramp up.
Week one began with Cycle Three on August 14. The first week was a starter dose
of 20 mg per day taken once. This week finished the 50 mg per day and started
with the 100 mg per day dose. Each dose increase is preceded by labs to make sure
Doris’ blood is responding appropriately. Then we have a consultation with a
provider, at which point we have the green light to continue the ramp up dose. Approximately
24 hours after the new dose, Doris has another lab draw to ensure she is not
experiencing any serious toxic issues like Tumor Lysis Syndrome. Each ramp up brings a little bit of discomfort
and gastrointestinal issues. We are blessed that these issues seem to be
resolved within a couple of days. It seems Doris is adjusting to the dosage,
but it takes two or three days for her to get used to the increase.
We continued our short walks, this week, but took Friday
off, because of the increase of fatigue that seems to follow the increased
dosage. Doris needs a bit more help getting out of chairs. Her spirits are
pretty good. There are definitely times when we would love to set cancer aside
for good. But now will not be the time. We are anticipating a few days away
after the medication ramp-up is complete. We hope to be able to set cancer
aside for those few days.
How to help others
I learned something this week in helping Doris to her
standing position from a seated position. Soris has quite a bit of shoulder and knee pain. As such, some of our couches or chairs are
easier for her to get out of on her own,
but for others she needs help. I found that if I squat down such that my arms
are level, then reach out my arms, she can pull forward on my arms. The
momentum that she generates with that approach is sufficient that she can more
easily pull herself up to a standing position. I think there is a principle involved
in this approach that matches how we help others.
When we want to help others, we first need to get on the
level where we are on equal ground of sorts. I think this is something that I
did not do very well while our children were in school, particularly in their
Math homework. I was always excited to share with them the cool things that
they were about to learn, instead of helping them to understand their current
level of learning better. Later when our son Jonathan was taking a math class
that I never had (I skipped it), I really did not have the background to lift
him beyond his current station of learning. I started where he was by asking
what he had learned in the lecture about how to solve the problem, then he
would lead our discussion and we would get to the point where he could move
forward in confidence. In this way, I think he discovered and strengthened his
understanding of what he needed to accomplish.
Life’s lessons are that way. Our savior has experienced the
depth of all our challenges and beyond. He was rejected by His own, betrayed by
a trusted disciple, and He was left alone to suffer more than any living soul
could ever suffer and He lived to tell about it. Ultimately He gave His life and
was resurrected to the reassurance of us all that we too can overcome all
things in Christ. Understanding this about our Lord, we can confidently trust
that He has been where we are. He does not confront us with comparisons or
bombard us with what the next level has in store for us. Rather, He takes us
where we are. He knows the extent of our pain, our disappointment, our
weakness, and succors us from that point to help us generate confidence in
moving forward under His tutelage and comforting guidance.
From Doris:
Small and simple things
I feel like the duck I saw climbing up a waterfall during
one of my walks. He was doing all he could to go against the current. I
am fighting against rushing water (cancer) that wants to carry me
downstream. Sometimes I am carried downstream and must accept that for
the time being, forward progress is halted.
Even when I feel my progress is halted, I know that from
Heavenly Father’s perspective, I am still going forward if I am doing all that I
can. Small and simple efforts done over
a long period of time bring about results.
I learned that principle when I quilted this quilt.
It took me 175 hours over a period of nine months to hand quilt
it. I thought I would never finish. But
when it was completed, I was surprised by its beauty.
There is a parallel between my need for cancer treatments
and my need for the Atonement of Jesus Christ. I cannot heal my body or my
spirit. I am not strong enough, righteous enough, wise enough, etc. to
heal myself. Jesus Christ is the source of all healing. He gave man the
necessary knowledge to attempt to cure cancer, but ultimately, He is the Healer
of all.
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